Matt Damon and Ben Affleck seem an unlikely pair to be teaching Widowers how to heal and regain purpose and joy in their lives. But in fact, they are a great example for us to follow. As I have mentioned before, when a husband dies his wife will like continue Reading...

I, and many others who write about the widower experience, often speak of loneliness. Paired with the pain of our grieving, loneliness is perhaps the most threatening challenge we face. Why? Because it often builds upon our grief and spreads its seed continue Reading...

This and similar enticing messages run constantly on dating sites and social media pages used by widowers. Usually, they get your attention with a picture of an attractive young gal about half your age, usually with some cleavage showing. Unfortunate continue Reading...

We widowers often hear that soon after the death of our wives we will lose many friends and possibly some family ties. This frequently occurs despite our best efforts to maintain these previously reliable and important relationships. This can result continue Reading...

Often after our wives pass, another crisis will come along that shakes us and causes us to confront our current state of thinking about our life going forward. This may be just what is needed to wake us and point us to a more promising future. While continue Reading...

(CNN) - At age 99, former President Jimmy Carter has been many things: humanitarian, Sunday school teacher, woodworker, naval lieutenant, father, husband. Now he’s facing a role that’s new to him but familiar to millions of older adults: that of a wi continue Reading...

Whether quoting from Wayne’s World or the Bible, the phrase “I am not worthy” may describe how we feel at times after our wives pass away. A ritual of self-condemnation and feelings of inadequacy often overwhelm us, especially when we are alone. It i continue Reading...

Shortly after my wife’s death, I went to the mountains by myself for a week and screamed as loud and often as I wanted to. But now, 7 years later, I no longer feel the anger I felt then. I now forget how easy it was to cut myself off from everyone an continue Reading...

Eight years ago, I found myself where many of you are today... in deep grieving mode and without the one person I could always rely upon to hear, support, and love me whenever I was facing a major challenge. I, like many of you, had to decide: Do I h continue Reading...

Since your wife died, how often have you been thoroughly confused by the kindness of women towards you? How often have you, even though you know it is wrong, thought there might be something there? I am not embarrassed to tell you that I had many suc continue Reading...

Just try to be angry and grateful at the same time. Hard, isn’t it? It is difficult because the focus on one interferes with your ability to do the other. Once we get past the numbness after our wife passes, we usually sink into a period of deep grie continue Reading...

Expectations In June, I had the privilege of attending the TAPS Massachusetts Men’s Retreat — my first TAPS retreat. My expectations of fitting in or finding connections among the group were honestly very low. My background — my loss — sets me apart continue Reading...